The little things.

I need to remind myself of this more often. We're all a part of something big and it is the little things that count and make life magical!

       [img. postsecret]

Two weeks away feels like the world should've changed 

But I'm home now

And things still look the same 

Weekend Recap.

     It was a roller coaster to say the least. Friday after work me and some of the girls went out in Hillcrest and PB where we vented about work and talked about life. It was a great way to unwind from a stressful week of work at the law office. 

    

    On Saturday I tutored for 2 hours, luckily he cooperated, making my job that much easier. 

After earning some quick cash I headed up to LaLa Land to Hang out with Aimee at the Fall Festival at the Farmers Market. I never realize how much I miss LA until I get there. This, along with my talk with Aimee, got me seriously thinking about my career choice. While I don't have an answer yet, I will be sure to keep you updated. 

     The Farmers Market was amazing. I kept thinking about how this would be right up my freshman year roommate Sam's alley as I constantly heard about the market she would go to in Eugene and how

great things, such as their Pad Thai, were. I seem to be reflecting a lot on the past lately, but LA got me thinking more about the future. This may or may not have been a good thing seeing as my mother was not the most supportive in my questioning of grad school, which I am currently in the middle of my first semester. 

    Finally, on Sunday I washed the weekend down with ALOT of sleep and the just release follow up to Paris Je T'aime; New York, I Love You. 

     While there were a few bumps in the road of my weekend it was ultimately a success AND I'm going back to LA on Wednesday and am taking the day off to do so ... couldn't be more excited!

Spring Fling

As we enter into the beginning of fall, designers spring lines are already hitting the runway and magazines, and I am head over heels in love with what they are showing. The mix of bright colors and patterns are to die for, as well as basics jazzed up with a sequin or an ultra fabulous shoe. I can't wait to hit the mall running with all the fabulosity that is spring collections. In the words of Rachel Zoe ... "I Die".

[img: lefashionimage]

[img: lefashionimage]

[img: lefashionimage]

Inspiration

Whooping my butt in to shape literally and making it my post-graduation resolution to get back into my pre-college shape. Not that I'm looking to be just like these celebrities but they are my current inspiration. My goal is to be at my best around christmas. 4 months to go ... 

 and when I get that old body back I will star rocking stuff like this. Simple and chic. 

21 Part Trois

Happy

23rd

BIRTHDAY

ARIANE

“Maybe mistakes are what make our fate... without them what would shape our lives? Maybe if we had never veered off course we wouldn't fall in love, have babies, or be who we are. After all, things change, so do cities, people come into your life and they go. But it's comforting to know that the ones you love are always in your heart... and if you're very lucky, a plane ride away”

- Sex and the City 

Thanks for coming into my life, and even as time goes on and our paths may change, I know you'll always be there for me, as I am for you ... and at most only a plane ride away. Love you and happy birthday!!

In Case You Were Wondering

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But what if I'm not ready for the "real world"

Never did I imagine coming out of college and entering the "real world" would be so difficult. I think my biggest issue is not having a job to pay the rent, that becomes my responsibility in 5.5 days.

But then to add to all of this I don't have a bed, a television, a couch, or any furniture that is possible to sit on.

Luckily I will be back living with my favorite roomie and one of my best friends who stole patio chairs from a dumpster. So I may not have much but I have one of my emotional rocks and the future to look forward too ... even if it may be a little bumpy along that way.

Oh! And I am so excited for graduate classes!!!!

VIVA LA VIDA!

Inspired ...

[img. The Notebook]

If you're a bird I'm a bird ...

[img. leloveimage]

"'And I'm lonely, Campbell', Julia adds. 'Why do you think I had to learn to act so independent? I also get mad too quickly, and I hog the covers, and my second tow is longer than my big one. My hair has its own zip code. Plus, I get certifiably crazy when I've got PMS. You don't love somebody because they're perfect,' she says. 'You love them in spite of the fact that they're not.'"

- Jodi Picoult My Sister's Keeper

GRANDuation

Not only is this upcoming weekend a pivotal moment for me as it is one of the many landmark moments in my life but it is a rather GRAND moment for my parents as well. It will mark the end of 9 years of private college tuition, and as my dad told me a few weeks ago, "I can start living my life now...". Yes Dad you can start living, and I will as well. In addition to all of this I will be the first child in my family to go to graduate school, and that too is something to celebrate. Therefore, with all this celebration I had to have the perfect outfit. After a few weeks of looking I finally decided on this dress and I am utterly obsessed and can't wait to accessorize it from head to toe making it grand just like the occasion ... 

"I like my money right where I can see it, hanging in my closet"

-Carrie Bradshaw 

Adventureland

So after weeks of discussion on how despite growing up with shopping trip after shopping trip and family get togethers in La La Land I had never been to Venice Beach or the Santa Monica Pier I finally made it in a semi-spontaneous day trip. Here are a few snapshots and thoughts from the adventure in La La Land

As we pulled up to park we stumbled upon this little gem, James' Beach from the movie I love you man where we proceeded to get a cocktail paid for by Kit from League of Their Own, no but really. In our conversation with her it occurred to me that after all my bad experiences with people and trust that I my personality most likely often comes off as harsh even if it is unintended, just a little something I should probably start working on ... 

This second image was discovered on our walk from the Venice boardwalk to Baby Blues BBQ and I thought it to be an important hypothetical question with the state of our world displayed ever so cooly on the exterior of a homes backyard wall, answer it as you see fit ... 

On our walk back to the car before heading over to the pier we noticed what appeared to be a sewage outlet with a boa

t floating in it, which just seemed bizarre but upon further inspection discovered this unbelievable community based around a series of canals where you can row a boat from house to house if you so choose under a series of bridges (each one unique), hence where the name Venice beach originated. I would not mind retiring here ... 

I'm 98% sure Ariane wasn't too pleased with my I don't really care to go anymore attitude at the end of the day, but I am ssoo glad she persisted because it was definitely something I needed to see. I loved the old school and classic charm of the pier and even the weirdos that accompany it as the sun goes down. The walk along the old wood planks, coaster, and ferris wheel ride were a great way to end the day!

My latest free time reading obsession ...

Interview magazine ... 

I r e a l l y want a subscription 

(... if anyone needs a graduation present idea this one would be great <3)

Soulmates ...

There are many different types of love and I am so greatful to have found an awesome friend and soulmate who I love. These pictures say it all ... The first one at the bottom said thank you to Diana as the caption ... I immediatly thought of last year and got super sentimental, she knows who she is, and it couldn't be August soon enough ... 

[image f. leloveimage]

"maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with"

- Sex and the City 

Kickin' it in my Cowboy Boots

I've noticed more and more recently the odd stares I get for rocking cowboy boots around campus. While yes, the fashion trend of them has come and gone, I will never let them go. They are a part of me. They've never been much of a "trend" thing for me since my dad always had and still has a pair in his closet. So USD, stare if you must, but I will never give up my cowboy boots!! YEE-HAW!

10 to go ...

So I took my procrastination to a new level today and I guess by writing on this as we speak I'm not helping my cause. I set out to finish this paper today seeing as it is due on Tuesday and we need to have 2 edited drafts and a final copy, yet I am only on page 6 of 16 right now. I have a feeling I'm not going to be making it into work tomorrow and if I do I am going to be a zombie. However, this is the last time that this will ever happen. While I was being all sentimental earlier I'm finding I'm quickly getting over this paper now and just want it to be done. 

Let it Linger

... So I've discovered over the past four years I have become a professional procrastinator, I have learned to take procrastination to a whole new level, it is my art. However, I have also discovered that I thrive under the time constraints I create for myself. I have my final english paper (16 pages) due on Tuesday, I have had 7 weeks to do it and I am just beginning it, and I want to put it off even longer. Typically this is the point when I would just power through it but I am getting really upset over it. Once this paper is done I am that much closer to graduation. True, I'll be at grad school next year but it will never be the same. While I understand what I have to do ... I just don't want to. I will continue sorting through these novels trying to justify why they are considered literary masterpieces and attempt to define the term masterpiece in the process, but I'm going to do it kicking and screaming, and not like I usually do. This is not me simply not wanting to do a paper because it is tedious, this is me not wanting to do it because this signifies the beginning of the end of college and college has been great!

"It's a Climb ... but the View is G R E A T"

Okay so judge me but the Hannah Montana Movie was fantastic! It weirds me out how in so many ways I related to it. This is most likely because it was about a huge changing point in her life, and I'm about to embark on a huge one myself. 

This is exactly how I feel, like I am sitting on the side of the road on top of everything my parents have provided for me, all dressed up, and with an utter look of confusion of my face. People constantly talk about the future and what is to come. Well how do they know? It's the future, there are no outcomes already waiting for us. Everything relies on the decisions we make in the present, one subtle thing we do differently could change e v e r y t h i n g ... 

And while I don't know if what I am doing by staying in San Diego is the best thing or the smartest, I also can't imagine looking back on my roaring twenties and wondering what if? Especially seeing as this is a question I've been asking myself and others a lot lately, it has replaced the two year olds "why?". And as I said to my dad on the phone today amidst signing a lease on my own (one of the scariest things I've done to date) ... "and if I fail, at least I can say I tried" 

"You tuck me in, turn off the light. Left me safe and sound at night. Little girls depend on things like that. Brushed my teeth and combed my hair. Had to drive me everywhere. You were always there when I looked back. You had to do it all alone, make a living, make a home. Must have been as hard as it could be. And when I couldn't sleep at night, scared things wouldn't turn out right, you would hold my hand and sing to me ... 

Caterpillar in the tree, how you wonder you you'll be. Can't go far but you can always dream ... Wish you may and wish you might, don't you worry, hold on tight. I promise you there will come a day ... Butterfly, fly away"

- Butterfly Fly Away Lyrics ...

And I Would RUN 500 Miles ...

Okay ... so I didn't exactly run 500 miles but I did run 5, thats from Capistrano to the pier and back. While this probably seems like some small feat to most this is HUGE for me. While it is true that I have been athletic since I was little, dancing since before I could walk, and joined the USD crew team as a freshman, I have never been much of a runner. My feet always preferred dancing than running I guess, and the exercised induced asthma has not been any help. But today I did it, I ran 5 miles ... the most I've EVER done. It's amazing how accomplished I feel about this. I am ready to conquer the day now!!! Hello sweet wednesday, I'm gonna own you!!

"I feel infinite ... and in that moment I swear we are infinite"

- The perks of being a Wallflower 

My Bittersweet Symphony ...

I'm going to miss this so much it hurts. My mom has been the voice in the back of my head while I've been at USD constantly reminding me that it is going to be over before I know it. Well it's almost over and I can't believe it. I feel like so many of the little things I took for granted when they were happening but looking back on them now realize what pivotal moments they were. 

Decisions:

Despite telling my parents I was going to USD after moving my oldest brother in when I was 9, they still couldn't believe it when I actually sent in my acceptance. However, while choosing a school solely on its appearance and the fact that I liked how all the buildings matched may have not always seemed to be the best decision, looking back now it was the right one and I'm glad that, that is what got me here because I realized how much it had to offer that a tour or overnight could have never accomplished. 

Roomies: 

I remember receiving my roommate letter in the male freshman year. Calling Sam to introduce myself was probably on of the funniest situations as Lily (her sister) picked up the phone and screamed in utter excitement at the top of your lungs ... "SSSAAMMM IT"S YOUR ROOMMATE" ... Ironically that phone call made us both late for the same job as she worked at Hollister and I at Abercrombie. The online conversations the followed I will cherish forever, especially her threatening to jump on a girls back and spray hairspray and or moose in their eyes if they attempted to steal either of our bath mats in the johnny squares 

Ariane was a happy accident Junior year as when my plans to go abroad didn't work out and I was in dire need of a roommate and an apartment on the beach. Luckily that same week she posted on facebook that she was in need of a roomie as well. She has become one of, if not the best friend I could have asked for out of USD. Our emotional movie dates and dinner dates have been my savior. I have laughed more with her than anyone else and no matter how down I am she can always come up with some stupid anecdotal story, typically of something we have done together, that can put a smile on my face. We also make a great team when painting the town red, we single-handedly became best friends with the entire Typhoon staff in a two week period, and even now when we go back, despite half the staff having moved on, can still get free drinks. And finally, as we so lovingly pointed out to a guy this weekend we tell each other 

e v e r y t h i n g (well maybe just 98%)

Friends:

Megan and Morgan I'm going to include you in with the Jamaica boys because that's how it should be. The three of us make some sort of weird unit and even though we might not remember most of our nights together, they have all been perfect, and our days where we try to piece them together are the highlight of my weeks. And the Jamaica boys (Scott, Serge, Fly, Blue Ray, Jeffie, and Plum), I don't think I'd have anything to do without you ... life would be pretty boring but I still believe my opinion helps out in your shopping at the market ... an 8 lb. steak is not necessary even when it is only $10. 

School:

In the last few weeks, even when I am swamped with work, papers, and tests, I push myself to go because I know I only have a month left of this and it truly is bittersweet. And, everything that has happened in between class, strolling around campus, and social life has been my symphony over the past four years and I am proud to say it is nearly complete and it is my masterpiece ... and I wouldn't change a note of it. 

Simply Shabby Chic

Everything about this outfit is perfect to me. My goal is able to throw on a ton of separates like this and make it appear so put together and effortless. I love the messy hair paired with the snake skin heels. I love it all!

[image f. olsenanonymous] 

Lyrics to l i v e by

This song never gets old and the more I listen to it the more I appreciate it. Every time it comes on in my car I insist on rolling all the windows down, very Cruel Intentionsesque ... be happy and be free!

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'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony this life

Trying to make ends meet, you're a slave to the money then you die

I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down 

You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet, yeah 

No change, I can't change, I can't change, I can't change, 

but I'm here in my mold , I am here in my mold 

But I'm a million different people from one day to the next

I can't change my mold, no, no, no, no, no

She spins on her toes w h e r e e v e r she goes

[image f. Peonies and Polaroids]

I brought up how much I miss dancing a few weeks back but this picture makes me realize the extent to how much I miss it. The friendships and being back stage, and to add to it I did a quartet from swan lake with outfits very similar to this. I can't wait for summer when I can get back to dance, my first love ... 

She's c o u n t r y ...

What a crazy and amazing weekend. Well, more than a weekend since I was in Arizona from wednesday to sunday. Just a quick recap on a little of what it entailed:

• 3 races
• Seeing Kasey Kahne and Elliot Sadler up close and personal
• Getting molested by 95% of men
• Wearing my cowboy boots almost everyday and others thinking nothing of it but complimenting me on my style (which was amazing compared to all the other women decked out in Tony Stewart gear)
  
• Singing country songs at the top of my lungs when ever one came on, which was throughout the entire day, nearly non-stop 
• Drinking copious amounts of beer because when at a NASCAR event calories from beers don't count 
• Drinking said beer in 95 degree weather 
• Being with family 
• Drunkenly creating a drink with my brothers called "scamp", a mix of amp energy drink and scotch, because it was the only alcohol we had left and we no longer cared

Pursuit of Happiness

These images make me smile, both different, but remind me that happiness can be found in the simplest settings and with things we see everyday and often over look, but when we do open our eyes we see what we have is in that moment perfect. 

The day I broke up with MasterCard ...

"It was the hardest thing I've ever done - breaking up with my credit cards. We were sitting at the kitchen table, just MasterCard, Visa, and me ... 

It was a difficult time. MasterCard and I had had a relationship since college. When we met, it was a sunny fall day in my sophomore year, and I needed a new pair of jeans. The funny thing about credit-card applications in college is they don't seem like a serious financial venture ..." 

"... but the fact of the matter is, MasterCard could never buy me a peace of mind. And that is truly priceless!"

- It's a Wonderful Lie: 26 Truths about Life in Your Twenties 

(basically my life summed up in a book ... )

"Some things n e v e r change"

 A routine can be seen as boring and predictable, but somewhere in that routine we find comfort, something that is often absent in spontaneity. I'm not suggesting that living in the moment is a fault, it is quite the opposite, it makes life exciting, but as time progresses those that only live from moment to moment may discover that they are alone. It is finding a balance between routine (the constants and things that never change) and spontaneity (living in the moment) that is ideal, I'm on a journey to finding this balance ... if and when I find the answer i'll let you know the secret ... until then ... 

Utterly S e d u c e d by the Tudors

"Seduce me. Write Letters to me. And poems, I love poems. Ravish me with your words. Seduce me."

- Anne Boleyn (The Tudors)

     I never watched this show having loved the movie The Other Boleyn Girl, and not wanting the show to let me down. It has done quite the contrary, instead it has given me an even greater look into the scandalous life of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn, accompanied by the quick whit remarks of Anne and the good looks of Jonathan Rhys Myers. I've been seduced and am truly addicted ... 

Happy 21st Gibson!

FINALLY!!!

When life gives you lemons ... just add VODKA!!

Spring Fever

You're the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. 

- Edward Cullen (Twilight)

Just D A N C E ...

"Dance till stars come down from the rafters

Dance, Dance, D A N C E till you drop"

- W.H. Auden

      It's weird how something that used to be such a large part of us, that defined us, can be so easily dismissed when you forget who you are, where you come from, and most importantly who you are. I entered college confidently and now that I am about to leave I find that I am searching for that confidence. Everything "pointes" me back to dance. What a different road I could have taken, what I different person I could have become, but I chose not to take the road less traveled by, and it has made all the difference ... 

Till it be Morrow ...

"These violent delights have violent ends. And in their triumph die, like fire and powder, Which as they kiss, consume." - Romeo and Juliet 

Grad School!!!

"It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge"

- Albert Einstein 

     Today was an awesome morning. After weeks of anticipation I finally got my acceptance into SDSU. After years of talking trash on SDSU girls I'll be joining them but will be attending with USD style and spirit! Once a torero, A L W A Y S a torero!!